What I Really Meant to Say
by Kasumi S
Summary: Much sap. Much sweetness. Much happiness. Harry/Draco slash.


Harry and Draco sap, PG-13 for an insinuation and kisses and sap. Don't like, don't read. Harry PoV. Song by Cyndi Thomson.  
  
What I Really Meant to Say  
  
***  
What I really meant to say  
Is I'm dying here inside.  
And I miss you more each day  
There's not a night I haven't cried   
And baby, here's the truth  
I'm still in love with you  
That's what I really meant to say  
***  
  
I was surprised when I heard your voice from behind me. I thought I was imagining yet again, like I did many times before since you left me.  
  
But then I turned and there you were, a single person I knew in the faceless bustling crowds of Diagon Alley.  
  
"How have you been, Harry?" You smiled when you said that. Unsure was your expression, though it was covered well by one of your numerous masks. But then, I could always see past those, couldn't I?  
  
I just looked at you for a moment. Your hair was a tiny bit shorter than I last recalled. You were as pale as ever, with the tip of your nose a bit sunburned. I remembered how you'd never get tan in the least and it annoyed you to no end. You were as debonair as ever in a simple white shirt and tan slacks, a picture of glistening pureness against the blues and blacks and purples of many wizards' cloaks.  
  
And then I smiled that smile you always said would brighten your entire day no matter what mood you were in. "I've been fine, Draco, just fine."  
  
Your face relaxed and you and I exchanged comments on the weather and the star pattern last night. It was awkward, totally unlike when you would hold me at night and I'd talk about anything at all and then you would too and we'd go back and forth all night, not because we liked to talk but because we wanted the pleasure of listening to each other's voices. And every once in a while, you would let some hint drop about yourself and I would file it away in my heart for future reference.  
  
Finally, there was silence between us while people streamed around us swiftly.  
  
"Well... good bye. I'll see you around, Harry," you said. And I watched you make your way through the haggling and shouting people on the street as if in slow motion. And I felt myself dying.  
  
And I couldn't disillusion myself anymore. Unbidden, your name ripped from my throat. "Draco!"  
  
You turned and I flew to you. My arms found their way around your neck and I buried my nose in the base of your neck, breathing in your scent. Then I looked up at you, (you always were an inch or two taller than me) and began babbling incoherently. Or so you say.  
  
I can't really remember what I said, it was something like, "... Didn't mean it... miss you like hell... still love you... that's what I really meant to say..." I went on after that. I was pouring out my heart in front of hundreds of spectators, not to mention you, but I didn't care. I'd kept it in too long anyway.   
  
Your arms snaked around my waist and you gently told me to stop. "it's all right, Harry. I know. I know." And you kissed me right in the middle of Diagon Alley.  
  
We stopped when we heard a couple catcalls and we separated rather reluctantly. There were indulgent smiles and starry eyes all around us. I was thankful then that wizards never were homophobic.  
  
We grinned like Cheshire cats before you caught my eye. With a nod, we both Disapparated.  
  
***  
  
"What're you doing?"   
  
Harry looked up from his notebook. His lover was standing behind his chair, leaning over his shoulder. "Writing."  
  
"Can I see?" Draco grabbed Harry's notebook without waiting for an answer. Harry jumped up from his chair.  
  
"No, I'm not done! Give it back!" Harry attempted to remove it from Draco's grasp, but he held it out of Harry's reach.   
  
"Aww, let me read a bit." Draco skimmed Harry's writing and handed it back to his sulking lover. "You're a good writer."  
  
Harry sulked a bit more. Draco smiled and kissed his lips tenderly. "Please forgive me?" He tried to look innocent and pitiful and failed miserably.  
  
Harry nearly laughed, but managed to hold it in. "Hmm... I don't know..."  
  
"Please?"  
  
"You'll have to show me you're sorry."  
  
Draco's eyes lit up. "Gladly." Draco swept Harry into his arms and walked into their bedroom, slamming the door shut with his foot.  
  
And we all know what happened next. :)  
  
***  
The End. Well, you have read, now review. If you do, I shall love you forever.  
Kasumi S. 


End file.
